Tuesday, 1 April 2014

Whitsunday local council has closed - for good!


Whitsunday residents are revelling in celebration tonight at Airlie Beach, Bowen, Cannonvale, Proserpine, Collinsville and all spaces in between after council was declared bankrupt due to residents refusing to contract by not paying their ridiculously high rates notice and then doing something else even more bold.

In the best news we've heard since the Icelandic revolution, the local council has closed for good and all services such as rubblish, road and water have been taken over by the former council workers, some of whom were sacked in the past year, have managed to regain employment due to the savings of just a handful of management positions becoming obsolete.

Local high school economics teacher Mr Rasheen-Al Fincar told Whitsunday Examiner:

"We all suspected they were useless, now we see that things run better without them - they were paid way too much anyway...and they called us "Customers" when we are really their employer, without our rates being paid they cannot survive without us.

They forgot who works for who in the true democratic chain of command.

Now we decided as a last resort to do just that and they threatened to steal our homes and properties from us - even though we own it, it feels like rent to pay rates and we weren't getting value for it. So f**k em! Off to Centrelink with them for a lesson in humility and budgeting 101!"

A community funded efficiency report showed sacking the bulk of senior management positions would free up a few million dollars a year, which allowed for more 'real work' to happen with more 'boots on the ground'. The residents pay for their rubbish pickup direct to JJ Richard waste disposal company, and now have the choice to have their rubbish picked up weekly, forthnightly, or if a property is vacant then they can opt out - a move not possible under the unreasonable greed council that has ruled with iron fist for decades.

The roads are now fixed by Main Roads Dept (a division of state govt) and holding up well. Some of the pothole repairs made by previous contractors were poorly done and had to be done again, and again - netting private road contractors millions in profit as reward for deliberately doing a bad job with substandard materials and unqualified morons as their labour base.But their glory days are over now the residents are no longer tolerating the pickpocketing hand that has repeatedly groped in the public purse for too long.

UPDATE - 2PM: Bowen water woes solved by local excavator operator volunteers.
The water plants were shut off while machinery was used by volunteers to dig a new dam at bowen and then half filled with the Lake proserpine water using the 70 km pipeline.

The new Lake Bowen is also known as "The People's Damn" intentionally mispelled as a dedication to the brave bowen people who gave a 'damn' and started to revolution which saw the resignation of a council, plus the support of 3 other councillors leaving only 2 councillors left.

After a scandal of the council CEO drink driving to 'avoid a cyclone' the Mayor left in shame, quite unwilling to answer to the angry mob who thought it was very irresponsible and hoped she would sack or at least discipline the disgraced CEO. However the Mayor inflamed the situation by stating that no further action is required in a recent media release.

The people grew more and more irate with the laundry list of poor decisions and decided to join together in a public meeting at councils main office in Proserpine. There is a large section of the community who is of german descent and following the lead of the 'rates rebels', decided 'enough is enough' and brought with them sledgehammers and chisels.

IN A SCENE reminiscent of the fall of the Berlin Wall, they went to town on the council office, smashing thru walls as councillors and other staff fled screaming in horror as their "palace of public profiteering" came crashing down around them.

EXCLUSIVE PICS: The day of liberation from 'little hitlers'

It started with just one hearty tap of the sledgehammer...
Soon more people joined in, fathers and their sons pitch in with their trusty 'cold chisel'
Even BAYWATCH star David Hassellhoff enjoyed taking time out of  his whitsunday holiday to help the locals out.
A fearful councillor peers thru the first crack in the building in complete bewilderment as a grandmother and her  grandchild pass by, overheard muttering "Good riddance to bad rubbish!"
"Better The Devil You Know" - Kylie Minogue says no
The council building after todays revolution...

Proserpine had the greatest fireworks display in their towns history to celebrate. Similarly impressive fireworks held in Airlie, Bowen and Collinsville marked this momentous occasion in Australia history.
Fireworks and jubilant scenes across the whole region, as residents celebrate being perhaps the first area in Australia to rid itself of the parasites that have been sucking the people dry without mercy.

Poli-ticks been getting under your skin lately? Eww!
Philisopher Cash Snowden had this to say "They are just people in costumes who think they have more rights than other people. The reason their delusion persists is because most of the people they extort and dominate also believe their delusion."

Whitsunday has now been annexed as part of China, who now own the sugar mill and a handful of resorts with plans to build a casino, resort, buddist temple and a chinatown to boot. Western leaders have expressed outrage and are calling a UN security meeting to discuss military intervention and economic sanctions.
(C) AFP 2014

Unfortunately, it was soon realised that this whole story is utter BS, as it was just a April Fools joke...gotcha hahaha. Share and don't tell :-)

Monday, 10 February 2014

US Navy drone hits its own missile cruiser in 'malfunction'

Whoops! The damage in the side of the USS Chancellorville caused by a malfunctioning practice drone.
Some poor drone operator playing with their remote control joystick somewhere, might get their arse kicked by injured naval colleagues over this mishap.I know I would be more than a little irritated if a drone smashed thru the wall near where I was working :-P ...


The drone model illustrated is the same that hit the cruiser boat

A practice drone has slammed into the hull of the United States Navy's most advanced antimissile cruiser, wounding 2 navy sailors with minor burns. Which only goes to show that "Military" and "Intelligence" are not 2 words that go well together.

Original story: US drone strikes missile cruiser

Australian PM Tony Abbott called up US President Barrack Obama to offer his condolences to the cruisers damaged hull giving his usual "Ah, s**t happens doesn't it" response whenever bad news comes across his radar.

Tony Abbott gives $16M thanks to Cadbury chocolate

Wearing his sponsorship on his sleeve, right above other sponsor "The church of Jesus Christ and the latter day saints" (aka Mormons)

Australian Prime Minister, Tony Abbott, has thanked his cycling sponsor Cadbury chocolates with much more than a box of "Roses" chocolates.

"On behalf of myself and my fellow choco-lovin' australians, I offer, as a modest thank you gesture the sum of $16,000,000 to Cadbury." Mr Abbott said in a national press conference this week.
As the Roses ad goes:
"Thank you very much for the grant you've given, thank you very much, thank you very very much!"

His 2013 cycling sponsorship was in support of numerous charities, according to Tony Abbott's website (now deleted but recovered using 'The Internet Archive') http://web.archive.org/web/20130808102821/http://tonyabbott.com.au/PolliePedal/PolliePedal2013.aspx

"Pollie Pedal has raised $2.5 million for organisations such as the Poche Centre for Indigenous Health within the Sydney Medical School at the University of Sydney, the Royal Flying Doctor Service, Ronald McDonald House, Youth Insearch, and the Paralympic Games, as well as medical research into childhood leukaemia, diabetes, breast cancer and prostate cancer."

So good on Tony for making a difference, right?

Popular Fairfax media blog Crikey.com noted his pharmaceutical company sponsors of the Pollie Pedal have a tarnished record abroad. "In December 2012, AMGEN pleaded guilty to illegally marketing its product Arensep and agreed to pay $US762 million in criminal penalties as well as settlements in related whistle-blower lawsuits. Arensep is a synthetic version of erythropoietin – EPO – an artificial blood booster that stimulates the production of red blood cells. EPO has valuable uses in the treatment of anaemia and in the 1990s was used enthusiastically – and illegally – by endurance athletes in search of an effective energy boost." - Source:Crikey http://blogs.crikey.com.au/northern/2013/09/13/cheap-at-twice-the-price-the-prime-minister-and-big-pharma/?wpmp_switcher=mobile
Look at the dead centre of the picture - now try to forget what you just saw...the 2 in the elevator are.

So getting back to the Cadbury business - how is it right that Abbott can claim to be charitable whilst threatening the disability pensions of people like this woman who suffers from MS - http://www.canberratimes.com.au/act-news/tony-abbott-breaks-pension-pledge-on-disability-support-pension-20131225-2zwny.html

Sweet charity for a chocolate factory which is going to undoubtably contribute to Type 2 Diabetes and obesity related illnesses with its piss poor sugar-laden chocolate products, which will benefit the other cycling sponsors AlphaPharm, Pfizer, Roche and AMGEN.

"Looks like what I feed the public whenever I talk" Mr Abbott jokes to Cadbury workers.
On the bright side, expect golden hair nets and Willy Wonka as your tour guide if you visit Cadbury's Tasmanian chocolate factory, for $16,000,000 - I will go apes**t if Willy Wonka isn't there.

Saturday, 8 February 2014

9/11 Truther crashs Superbowl post-game interview

Matthew Mills, 30, from Brooklyn, N.Y. managed to lie him way past the multi-million dollar security mechanism at this years Superbowl 2014 pro football league championship. He told a security guard he was "late for work" implying he was part of the media team. Once inside he snuck up to the media desk where MVP Malcolm Smith was giving his post game interview, and took the opportunity to quickly steal the microphone and make his announcement to the whole nation as well as internationally where is it available on satellite/cable pay channels. This is the complete transcript of what Matthew said:
MILLS: "Investigate 9/11...9/11 was perpetrated by people inside our own government"
SMITH "Aiight...Is everyone alright?"

More awkward than the 9/11 allegations by Mills was the MVP's response - it was kind of like checking if anyones ears or pyschological condition was effected from being beat with the stick of truth.

Peter Caroll, who is the coach of the winning team Seattle Seahawks is also himself a 9/11 truther, and US media have largely ignored his comments on the matter. A google news search brought up only 1 result for US news and it was tucked away in a yahoo news blog. Iranian channel PRESS TV was the best coverage however due to claims of anti-semitism (i.e. any criticism of Israel, justified or not) the news outlet has been banned in the UK and intermittantly banned in the US as part of UN economic sanctions. The point is that if you live in UK or US you may not have access to PRESS TV. So here is the Press TV article reproduced for all you unable to access http://www.presstv.ir/detail/2014/02/03/349027/911-truth-coach-wins-super-bowl/

See also this new video uploaded Feb 7,2014 by Alex Jones Infowars

Since 9/11, the Super Bowl - America’s biggest annual event - has been drenched in war propaganda. The championship of American football, watched by more than 110 million Americans, the Super Bowl has become an orgy of flag-waving exhortations to “support the troops” who are allegedly defending what remains of the Americans’ freedom.

This year’s Super Bowl was different.

The Seattle Seahawks, coached by 9/11 truth-seeker Pete Carroll, crushed the Denver Broncos 43-8 and became the world champions of American football. It was a huge victory for Seattle and coach Carroll - and at least a small victory for the forces of peace and truth.

Last spring, Seahawks coach Pete Carroll became a legend in the 9/11 truth community by grilling the ex-US Army Chief of Staff four-star General Peter Chiarelli, about the 9/11 inside job. (I discussed this incident in my recent Press TV article “A 9/11 Truth Super Bowl?”)

On Sunday, 9/11 truth supporters gathered in living rooms and public houses all over America to cheer for coach Carroll’s Seattle Seahawks. Carroll’s underdogs delivered one of the most stunning and overpowering victories in the history of American football, crushing the favored Denver Broncos in every phase of the game.

The media had lined up against the Seahawks. Besides casting the rival Denver Broncos as favorites, America’s lamestream newspapers and TV and radio channels spent much of the two weeks before the game bashing the Seahawks as loudmouths and troublemakers. Seahawks cornerback Richard Sherman, the best pass defender in football, was raked over the coals of the mainstream media for bragging and celebrating too enthusiastically. (White media mouthpieces who called Sherman a “thug” were widely suspected of racism.)

Maybe it was just a coincidence, but immediately after the story about Pete Carroll being a 9/11 truther began to go viral in the blogosphere, the media suddenly started bashing Seattle. Oddly, the orchestrated media attack on Seattle as a bunch of unruly loud-mouths seemed to be obliquely targeting 9/11 truth supporter Pete Carroll. Yet the mainstream media was afraid to directly refer to Carroll’s support for 9/11 truth, for fear of helping promote a long-overdue national conversation on the subject.

The “official blogosphere,” however, had no such reservations. These are the corporate-sponsored pseudo-blogs that pretend to represent ordinary people, but actually operate as part of the official mind-control apparatus. These second-tier megaphones of the mainstream media’s Mighty Wurlitzer spent the two weeks before the Super Bowl attacking and mocking Pete Carroll for supporting 9/11 truth.

But the attacks backfired. Pete Carroll became a hero of the 9/11 truth movement, which according to polls includes more than 100 million Americans. And now Carroll’s Super Bowl triumph has made him a target for widespread admiration, not mockery.

Since Pete Carroll has become one of the most successful coaches in history thanks to his tremendous Super Bowl victory, will the mainstream media finally report on his questions about 9/11? I doubt it.

Those who want to spread 9/11 truth, the most important American political message since Paul Revere’s ride, will have to find creative ways of conveying this potentially world-changing censored information.

One such creative 9/11 truth supporter was already at work just minutes after the game ended. Breaking the mainstream media blackout, this young man managed to commandeer the microphone during a post-Super Bowl interview in Seattle’s locker room to inform tens of millions of viewers: “Investigate 9/11! 9/11 was perpetrated by people within our own government.”

Outraged headlines quickly erupted: “9/11 conspiracy theorist interrupts Super Bowl MVP’s press conference!”

One Zionist pseudo-blog responded with an angry, incoherent rant:

“Pete Carroll’s Seahawks won a Super Bowl across the river from Manhattan, which is almost like winning across the street from the Free Mason hall. Nevertheless, even though the Seahawks triumphed, Carroll had his Truther storm troopers cut off his players during post-game interviews to further their agenda.”

Winning across the river from Manhattan is ALMOST like winning across the street from Free Mason hall?! Christopher Bollyn’s book Solving 9/11 explains that New York’s B’nai B’rith chapter controls American freemasonry and was deeply involved in the 9/11 false flag events; presumed members include the confessed demolisher of World Trade Center Building 7, Larry Silverstein, and the corrupt judge who has quashed all genuine 9/11 litigation, Alvin Hellerstein, both of whom attend the same synagogue, which allegedly functions as de facto B’nai B’rith world headquarters. So 9/11 truth supporter Pete Carroll won his overpowering Super Bowl victory just a few miles away from where the murderous controlled demolitions of the three World Trade Center skyscrapers were plotted and carried out.

Now that Pete Carroll has become a huge celebrity, will the treasonous forces that suppress 9/11 truth force him to recant?

The professional traitors who cover up 9/11 used threats and physical attacks to drive 9/11 truth philanthropist Jimmy Walter out of the USA. They manufactured scandals to assail Charlie Sheen, possibly with the help of “crazy pills.” Their “terrorist threats” forced then-US Senator Mark Dayton, who had just excoriated the 9/11 cover-up on the floor of the Senate, to evacuate his entire staff from Washington, DC and announce his retirement.

They ruined the political careers of Congressional Representatives Cynthia McKinney and Curt Weldon. They chased Steven Jones and yours truly out of the academy. They murdered Senator Paul Wellstone, and may have “sent a message” to Congressman Dennis Kucinich, whose family members suddenly began dying when the Congressman announced he would investigate the 9/11 “put options.”

There are dozens of 9/11-related “suspicious deaths.”

I suspect Pete Carroll may be getting a message one way or another (or he may have already gotten the message): “Either take back what you have already said, or, at the very least, keep your mouth shut about 9/11 from now on.”

I hope Carroll tells them to go to hell, and uses his post-Super Bowl superstardom to draw attention to groups like Architects and Engineers for 9/11 Truth. Perhaps he could even help organize NFL players to come out for 9/11 truth.

Such moves would take immense courage and patriotic commitment. But coach Carroll, who had the guts to grill a four-star general about the 9/11 inside job, is obviously a brave and patriotic man.

Regardless of how Pete Carroll chooses to use the post-Super Bowl media spotlight, let us hope and pray that more and more Americans will find the same kind of courage he found last spring during his meeting with General Chiarelli. The eventual result could be a smashing, epic victory for truth and justice.

Sochi Olympic Ring Fail was intentional

Worldwide sporting fans were hyped up in Sochi as the opening ceremony kicked off last night.

But amongst the fanfare of special effects and classical choreography, the white elephant in the room - that awkward moment when the last olympic ring failed to open and join the other 4 rings.

Some inside sources close to the organising committee have revealed to us in a Whitsunday Examiner exclusive interview that the infamous Sochi Olympic Ring Fail was Putin's subliminal message to US. On the conditions of anonymity the insider had this to say...

"Putin called me just hours before the ceremony and told me US President Barrack Obama, UK Prime Minister David Cameron and German chancellor Angela Merkel were not invited and not welcome to attend, for various reasons such as their stance over Syria, Homosexuality, up to what happened a few days ago with the US diplomat who was caught on tape trying to control the fate of our troubled neighbor and former USSR state Ukraine."

"Each ring on the Olympic official logo is representative of the 5 major continent and last ring, the red one,is represent of America"
"Our grand leader President Putin also tell me this is to let the entire world know that US govt is like the guy is "Meet The Parents/Meet The Fockers"...Gregor I think his name was. Anyway, its about "The circle of trust" and this ring not opening and joining the other circles is a profound symbolisation of their non co-operation. When the "ring fail" - as some you ignoramus western media calls it - went to air, after the message of the moment had time to sink in we reverted to footage from rehearsal of complete rings to demonstrate that we are open to US rejoining the "Circle of Trust" again, but they must stop with their constant attempts to completely control the world. Arming terrorist in Syria thru the CIA on Turkish border, killing Gadaffi - a great african role model leader - then having Hillary Clinton laugh about it on TV is more than just a little disrespectful...it shows heart colder than Siberia!"

Friday, 7 February 2014

"F**k The EU" - US Ambassador's leaked phone call

Proof that the US government thinks they rule the world. This is your wake up call.

Is it really up to the US to decide anything about any other country other than themselves?

Is this the absolute height of awkwardness?

U.S. Assistant Secretary of State Victoria Nuland has really put her foot in her mouth after a phone call with her US ambassadore counterpart in Ukraine's capital city Kiev.

Rather than fire Nuland for the deeply embarrasing and inappropriate comments, US Officials focused their energy on distracting the media by blaming Russia for the leak.

In the audio recording Nuland and her collegue are discussing who should be in charge of Ukraine. On top of that the US announced today, despite the homelessness of a growing number of Americans, that "the United States is ready to provide financial support to Ukraine if the country implements the necessary political reforms" senior US diplomat Victoria Nuland said at a press conference. She also said she would not comment on her conversation with the US ambassador to Ukraine, in which the two discussed who should be in the next Ukrainian government.

So it's official now : the US government (or powerful elements within it) are meddling with other countries affairs. Hopefully this will open up the eyes of those who have long criticised and discredited the so-called 'conspiracy theorists'.

What next will be discovered? 9/11 was an inside job? Perhaps not, but in the information age anything could happen as secrets are hacked, leaked, and rapidly disseminated online. Hail to the internet!

UPDATE: Attempted plane hijack from Ukraine to Sochi,Russia was foiled. This story is quite unbelieveable...the hijacker was said to be drunk, pilots fooled him to believe the plane was landing in sochi when in fact it was on its regular flight path to istanbul, Turkey and 2 other significant details missing in the story.

What is the hijackers identity? Was he detained and charges laid? Hmmmm...


Bitcoin Bullies ruin geeks lives in brutal bloodbath

Got the Bitcoin Blues?

Investors in bitcoin are reeling in horror this week after their cryptofunds were raided by hackers who turned the bitcoin exchange site Conbase into a bloodbath of frozen screens and frozen funds.

Users of the site have been saving, buying, trading and exchanging the Bitcoins for a few years now, pinning too much faith in numbers on a screen actually being worth anything. Some ultra-enthusiatic geeks even bought special hardware devices known as 'Miners' that process Bitcon transactions and pay a kind of transaction fee percentage in exchange for computer processing power...it all sounds too good to be true.


The geeks, who thought they were so wise, expecting to use their brainyness to their financial advantage become the victims of another group of geeks known as '3B' or the "BULLY BITCOIN BANDITS". The geeks who were often pushed around and bullied for their lunch money at primary school and later high school and college had never in their wildest dreams imagined the horrifying scenerio they were about to face.

First, logged into Coinbase exchange...Secondly, screen flashes like lightning then fully freezes up. After 30 seconds of frantically bashing CTL+ALT+DEL to recover the computer using task manager, or at the very least reboot the locked up piece of shit computer...it was all over.

One geek...umm...computer whizz shared his experience with W.E.News. "After that awkward screen freeze, it finally came to, but when it did I lost my entire Bitcon fortune. I had 100,000 in BitCoins stolen and I was helpless to stop it. CoinBase is not responding to any of us that lost our money, so we are uber-upset right now. All our blockchains are tangled and the BITCON BANDITS continue to plunder the CoinBase memberships cryptocurrency assets without any security or resistance to defend ourselves. It's the first time since leaving school that I've had my salad tossed by a bully, they held me and financially raped my assets, all I could do was stare at the screen and scream."

Other users have committed real bank robberies so they could repurchase more BitCoin. Some users have even resorted to suicide over the loss of their beloved currency. Counselling services are overwhelmed by all affected by the tragedy.

The hacker group responsible is unsympathetic..."We came, we stole, they cried!" joked the leader, operating under the handle 'G'N'R-Cornshucker'. "It was just a bit of fun for us to come together, and invading them like wolves in a chicken coop - easy pickings!"

"Next time we plan to personally visit each Bitcoin trader and give them a big f**king wedgie. Oh, and laugh 'ha,ha' like Nelson from The Simpsons."

Authorities cite this unfortunate incident as yet another lame excuse to shut down BitCoin activity.

Please donate to the Bitcoin massacre victims here : f8e407f9-4d9e-47da-b04d-28f7dcd729a7

Thursday, 6 February 2014

Pakistani invents "Free Energy" magnet motor

Wasif Kahloon responds to Facebook critics of his proof of concept video of what allegedly is a magnet motor that generates electricity without any input to start it.

"We (are) not afraid from anyone,no one can stop us from working,because Allah with us and we have a big group too.
We can handle them in any condition so no one to worried about that,anyone can't stop us by force and by threats..
We (are) not afraid because life and death in the hand of Allah,we (are) afraid only from our Allah,lets see who died,u need not worried about our life,this project will done at any cost.we cant show our group,we will see who died" Wasif Kahloon (on his Facebook profile on 7/2/14)

The process is said to be based on the Peredev Magnet Motor which was shut down before production could get into full swing by impatient investors who charged him with fraud because Perendev Power did not meet the product release deadlines.

In Australia, 2 inventors in Cairns, QLD made their version of the overunity magnet motor called LEA (Lutec Electrical Amplifier)but again, it mysterious dissapeared after SKY NEWS did a story on it.

Fast forward to later 2000's and their is Muammer Yildiz who presented his motor at Delft University in Holland. The professor their is convinced this magnet motor stuff is the real deal. But again, it has disappeared from the public domain...

Free Energy forum: http://www.overunity.com/14239/wasif-kahloons-magnet-motor/#.UvPkuftjG3h

Feminist "Free Bleeding" trend gains attention

Kelly Jo, a blogger writing for Feministing.com is creating quite a stir in social media this week with her blog entitled "Letting Ourselves Bleed".

The controversial feminist believes it to be a liberating experience, here's a quote:

"More of a mindset than it is an action, the idea is, as this blog title gives away, letting ourselves bleed. No judgement, no worries about messiness or cleanliness. Just letting it happen.

This might look different for different menstruators. We are always, technically, “letting” ourselves bleed. There are no menstrual plugs (thank god). But how often do we take a second, or a few, or a whole menstrual cycle, to mentally let our body do it’s thing. And appreciate it for what it does.

Here’s an assignment: Get comfortable, wear something you don’t mind bleeding in (heck, this might even include a tampon! remember, this is about you and what’s comfortable for you) or lay on your bed naked with sheets you don’t mind bleeding on, and focus your thoughts on letting yourself bleed."

Source: http://community.feministing.com/2012/08/27/letting-ourselves-bleed/

As a male, I'm obviously not qualified to comment on such issues...but I invite all females reading this, whether you agree or disagree with this trend, to leave a comments below.

Bayer CEO says new cancer drug only for rich people

Bayer, maker of 'Aspirin' and one of the worlds biggest pharmaceutical corporations has put their foot in it once again, with the CEO announcing that their Nexavar Cancer drug is only for quote "Western Countries Only". Russia Today news investigated the affordability of the drug and found it would take an average american 2 job incomes to be able to access 1 years treatment ($96,000).

For an average person living in India, it would take 45 annual incomes!

Angry Indians have fought back by releasing 'knock-off' versions which has in turn angered Bayer. This company has demonstrated once again that profits always come before people.

It's certainly not the first time Bayer has made themselves look foolish. Their greed shows no bounds, in fact, MS-NBC did a story on Bayer blood transfusion products contaminated with the AIDS virus. When the product was recalled Bayer had the nerve to resell the AIDS contamined product onto other continents!

So when you see one of their ads on TV touting their current product is the most "best selling" or "number 1 trusted brand" you may want to remember and share this blog to your friends and family who are unwittingly buying Bayers products and helping these 'corpo-rat' feed off peoples illnesses.


Acknowledged: RT (Russia Today) and MSNBC. All rights reserved by original news source. Please contact if you believe this blog is in violation of law.***

Tuesday, 4 February 2014

Aussie Seniors placed on Terror Watch List

Enemy of the state?

FIRST it was bikies, then Anonymous hackers...now the federal government has announced seniors as the latest terrorist threat.

The head of ASIO cited reasons of national security for the Registered Terrorist Organisations list update.

"Older australians know far too much and pose a great risk by telling their sons and daughters and grandchildren about how life was less regulated in the earlier half of the 1900's" Mr [REDACTED] said.

"They tell about times when fireworks were commonplace, and people didn't have to wear bicycle helmets..." He went on to say.

Martha Mavis, the Spokesperson for APIA (Australian Pensioners Insurance Association) said the new ruling was unjust.

"Many of our members fought in wars to defeat the nazis, and now it seems more and more that 'little hitlers' are popping up like weeds in my vege garden. They have infiltrated the local councils, the police force..erm..service, and there are even some lurking in the upper echelons of our government." Mrs Mavis stated.

"This is and has always been considered a 'free country' due to our enjoyment of liberties, but now we're being fined and arrested just for camping in our RVs on our twilight right of passage - to tour around Oz after retirement. Councils are taxing us too much for rates, so we were forced to sell the home and bought the RV (recretional vechicle). Don't we deserve that much after putting in the hard yards with a lifetime of wage slavery"

Another member, a former WWII veteran told us "They thought one lunatic at Port Arthur was worth disarming us all, if that were logical - you wouldn't sack the whole church over one pedo priest would you? Nor would it make sense to sack the entire govt if one politician lies or engages in corruption - many do, but it all seems like double standards to me!"

ASIO head Mr [REDACTED] replied to Mrs. Mavis' concerns "We are sympathetic, but times have changed, this generation is becoming increasingly stupid and its up to us to make sure they don't harm themselves or others. Its dangerous to be filling their heads with ideals of freedom from the days of old. We only have the best interests of the nation at heart."

When W.E.News asked whats those 'best interests' were, Mr [REDACTED] explained corporate interests are top priority.

"Some countries want our resources, we must sell it all off cheap or face 'liberation' of our precious resources by aggressive nations. By submitting to their demands, we save the country from invasion as well as line our own pockets...people just need to relax, watch My Kitchen Rules and similar programmes we have graciously provided for your entertainment, and simply trust their govt. even if it appears to them that the govt. doesn't trust them."

Tupac Shakur found alive and well in QLD

The infamous 2Pac was shot back in the 1990's...at least that's the story the world has been led to believe.

Anyone familiar with the Rodriguez story of South Africans being told he died on stage, then having the shock of seeing him in concert in 1998? Moving on...

This week, Tupac Shakur, now 43, has been discovered on an uninhabited island in the popular tourist mecca of Australia - The Whitsundays.

He was spotted by a US marine drone which was operating in a joint military exercise Talisman Sabre. The drone remote pilot saw what at first he believed to be an aboriginal decendant that survived brutal massacre by the last 2 centuries of british colonial genocide.

But a follow up search by CQ search and rescue helicopter uncovered a shocking discovery that has left hip hop fans worldwide rejoicing.

"I saw no changes" Mr. Shakur told W.E.News in a world first exclusive interview. "We weren't likely to have a black president, and when I heard on my shortwave crystal radio that it had finally happened, I was ready to return home. But Obama was the false prophet, I was ashamed to be black, so here I stayed..."

"It's just me against the world baby, and how do you want it? I never wanted it like this, but the world is crazy. I had to escape, my family knew it too, that faking my death was the only way I could get some peace"

When asked if about his future plans, 2Pac sat in silence reflection with his hand stroking his long beard, deep in thought..."I would like to be President, show everyone I can bring the social change where Obama failed, also in my spare time I'd like to take the throne off that self proclaimed 'Rap God' (referring to Eminem's new single from his album MMLP2) and make people love me again, love hip hop, and show them theres hope still."

2Pac's new album "Kast-A-Way" is scheduled for release next month, his record company reviving a standing recording contract forcing him back in the studio immediately.

It will feature the new singles "S**t Ain't Changed", and "Whitsunday Love"

Disturbing "Brown Tofu" craze hits the western world

Advocates for Sustainable Living have discovered a new food trend sweeping the western world...for some it's hard to stomach - Brown Tofu.

Brown Tofu is a new food produced by recovering faecal matter from humans in what some experts claim is the ultimate form of recycling.

A bunch of hippies living in the marijuana capital of Australia, Nimbin NSW, have devised a patented method to safety produce their innovative product which despite reservations from many Australians is proving to be a big hit worldwide.

The BROWN TOFU factory has been in operation for over a year now, located further south at Canberra where a fresh supply of tasty excretment is steady all year round, and production peaks higher at election time.

The Dept of Agriculture in conjunction with Local Councils have done a sustainability study of the new venture and agree that it will reduce waste and at the same time provide new job opportunities and revenue for the nation.

"People have been taking our crap for decades now" said Mayor Aintwotshi Joostobi. "I advocate it for everyone, but off the record, f**ked if you see me eat that s**t!"

The hippies got the new food venture off the ground with financial assistance from the UN Sustainable Development Trust Fund as well as a grant from NEIS (New Enterprise Incentive Scheme) by Centrelink.

Australia leads the world now in Tofu production, formerly an honor held by Japan. Many asian markets are also turning on to the brown, with billions sick of the bland taste of the traditional white tofu they've been forced to eat the past few centuries.

Man found dead after waiting for Internet to load

A WHITSUNDAY man has been found dead in his home by police yesterday.

A QPS spokesperson has revealed to W.E.News that the cause of death was highly likely to be attributed to the regions excruiatingly slow mobile broadband.

They had examined the laptop the man had been using and found the page the victim was trying to access (the Google search home page) had been loading for several days.

The page was still trying to load when the body was discovered.

This is not the first time such a tragedy has occured, another local woman Chopar Hollic died last week whilst attempting to purchase jewellery on eBay, only to be left waiting days for the Paypal login page to load so she could finalise her would-be purchase.

Her mother managed to just complete the transaction after many attempts reloading the browser and will be selling the daughters jewellery in a special charity auction, with proceeds to be donated to the federal governments embattled NBN program.

"I just want to raise awareness of this serious issue...my daughters untimely death was not in vain. We can all improve this dreadful situation if we can all connect - fat (expletive) chance of that when our country is run my morons on both sides of politics!" Chopar's mother told us.

Recently the Dalai Lama even had issues during the Australian leg of his world tour. He was seen by shocked onlookers cursing expletives and headbutting the computer screen repeatedly after his holiness attemped to use Facebook to contact his friends and family back in Tibet. One source close to Tenzin told us he had never seen such rage and fiery demonic anger in his eyes as he witnessed on that awkward day.

The Minister of Communication, Malcolm Turnbull was unable to comment, also due to the state of Australia's poor communication issues.