Tuesday, 4 February 2014

Disturbing "Brown Tofu" craze hits the western world

Advocates for Sustainable Living have discovered a new food trend sweeping the western world...for some it's hard to stomach - Brown Tofu.

Brown Tofu is a new food produced by recovering faecal matter from humans in what some experts claim is the ultimate form of recycling.

A bunch of hippies living in the marijuana capital of Australia, Nimbin NSW, have devised a patented method to safety produce their innovative product which despite reservations from many Australians is proving to be a big hit worldwide.

The BROWN TOFU factory has been in operation for over a year now, located further south at Canberra where a fresh supply of tasty excretment is steady all year round, and production peaks higher at election time.

The Dept of Agriculture in conjunction with Local Councils have done a sustainability study of the new venture and agree that it will reduce waste and at the same time provide new job opportunities and revenue for the nation.

"People have been taking our crap for decades now" said Mayor Aintwotshi Joostobi. "I advocate it for everyone, but off the record, f**ked if you see me eat that s**t!"

The hippies got the new food venture off the ground with financial assistance from the UN Sustainable Development Trust Fund as well as a grant from NEIS (New Enterprise Incentive Scheme) by Centrelink.

Australia leads the world now in Tofu production, formerly an honor held by Japan. Many asian markets are also turning on to the brown, with billions sick of the bland taste of the traditional white tofu they've been forced to eat the past few centuries.